Fear of Falling

I lie awake at night

and cringe at the memory

of sitting on a cliff

feeling like the wind

not thinking about falling

until the rocks shifted

under my grungy shoes.

Until the rough little pebble

slid right past my achy feet

and tumbled off the side

and fell into the water.

At the time I didn't notice

at the time I didn't care.

But as I lie in bed at night

feeling cold and lonely

I think about that day

and how I could have fallen

and how I didn't.

But the memory still hurts.

The memory is still there.

And now I have a fear.

A fear of falling.